Goodbye. Have you ever wondered how many times do we say "goodbye" over the course of life? Some are regular, temporary goodbyes, while others are big, dramatic, end-of-relationship goodbyes. There are quiet see-you-in-the-afterlife goodbyes and goodbyes that are never really said at all.
I, unfortunately, had to say and hear many goodbyes in my life. Some were for good, some not, some I still wish never happened. I can't say I regret having said goodbye, rather that I wish things would have been different so that I would have never even had to think about saying it. Maybe in a parallel universe...
The regular goodbyes are not really sad, maybe just a little bit. You always know they are not lasting, they are mostly a formality.
The end-of-relationship goodbyes are a big deal. This "goodbye" is the swan song of that relationship. It's always hard and has lasting effects, whether you were the one who said it or the one who heard it. You are cutting off a chunk of your life with that goodbye, and if you were not the one to cut the cord, you will feel bitter long after. It takes time to separate yourself from that period of your now past and move on, forming new relationships with people.
The quiet goodbyes to the ones who pass away are the most painful, yet they bring a sense of closure. There is nothing that can be done, and you were not betrayed or hurt by them, but separated by death, something you can't control or bargain with. The idea of them still being with you in spirit and seeing them and being reunited with them once you die helps making it seem like a temporary goodbye (and maybe it is one!). And even if nothingness is all there is and you just cease to exist once your heart stops beating and your brain dies, you will never know it. Still, a comforting thought to get through the remainder of your life without your loved ones.
And, finally, the goodbyes that are never really said at all. These are the worst kind, as you will never get closure. You will learn to live with that, but it will haunt you. It will always be somewhere in the back of your mind, waiting to unveil itself and open up the wounds you tried so carefully to conceal. Sometimes they are reversible and while you will never get back what you once had, it will still be something better than an unsaid goodbye. Sometimes you get a chance to talk it through and say your goodbyes. Otherwise, it's left to linger in the depths of your mind.
One of the worst things about goodbyes is the pre-goodbye period, when everything starts deteriorating and you're long past the point of return. It is hanging over you like impending doom, you know it, and the helplessness and understanding of not being able to fix it at this point is what's killing you.
I have been granted exceptional intuition, and whether it's a gift or a curse, it makes sure I know when things are about to turn onto the road to nowhere. The waiting is agonizing but there's always hope that things are going to end up being okay.
I, unfortunately, had to say and hear many goodbyes in my life. Some were for good, some not, some I still wish never happened. I can't say I regret having said goodbye, rather that I wish things would have been different so that I would have never even had to think about saying it. Maybe in a parallel universe...
The regular goodbyes are not really sad, maybe just a little bit. You always know they are not lasting, they are mostly a formality.
The end-of-relationship goodbyes are a big deal. This "goodbye" is the swan song of that relationship. It's always hard and has lasting effects, whether you were the one who said it or the one who heard it. You are cutting off a chunk of your life with that goodbye, and if you were not the one to cut the cord, you will feel bitter long after. It takes time to separate yourself from that period of your now past and move on, forming new relationships with people.
The quiet goodbyes to the ones who pass away are the most painful, yet they bring a sense of closure. There is nothing that can be done, and you were not betrayed or hurt by them, but separated by death, something you can't control or bargain with. The idea of them still being with you in spirit and seeing them and being reunited with them once you die helps making it seem like a temporary goodbye (and maybe it is one!). And even if nothingness is all there is and you just cease to exist once your heart stops beating and your brain dies, you will never know it. Still, a comforting thought to get through the remainder of your life without your loved ones.
And, finally, the goodbyes that are never really said at all. These are the worst kind, as you will never get closure. You will learn to live with that, but it will haunt you. It will always be somewhere in the back of your mind, waiting to unveil itself and open up the wounds you tried so carefully to conceal. Sometimes they are reversible and while you will never get back what you once had, it will still be something better than an unsaid goodbye. Sometimes you get a chance to talk it through and say your goodbyes. Otherwise, it's left to linger in the depths of your mind.
One of the worst things about goodbyes is the pre-goodbye period, when everything starts deteriorating and you're long past the point of return. It is hanging over you like impending doom, you know it, and the helplessness and understanding of not being able to fix it at this point is what's killing you.
I have been granted exceptional intuition, and whether it's a gift or a curse, it makes sure I know when things are about to turn onto the road to nowhere. The waiting is agonizing but there's always hope that things are going to end up being okay.
